The sometimes incomprehensible actions of middle schoolers can be a mystery to parents. Take the child who, though you've just asked him to complete a few simple tasks around the house, has "mysteriously" forgotten your request and is instead pouring himself a glass of milk as he begins to call a friend.

Believe it or not, this unpredictable behavior is often due to the changing nature of a child's brain. At the beginning of the decade, scientists at the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) announced new research showing that there is a significant surge in growth in the pre-adolescent brain. Prior to this study, it was believed that all brain growth happened during the first three years of life.

Here is what researchers learned:

• Though brain size may stabilize by age five, brain growth and change continues through the teen years.
   

• The surge of hormones at puberty seems to stimulate brain growth in pre-adolescents. The brain's frontal lobes (the areas that aid self-control, judgment, emotional maturity, organizing and planning) begin to grow again, starting at about age 10 for girls and age 12 for boys.
   

• Nerve cells that aid intelligence, consciousness and self-awareness keep growing even into a person's 20s.
   

• Brain growth is basically a "use-it-or-lose-it" process. The brain's ability to acquire and retain new information will expand if stimulated or shrink if neglected. Those skills that are regularly exercised or those experiences that are traumatic or particularly positive become part of the brain's long-term memory. Those that are not tend to be lost after a short time.
   

• During the pre-teen and teenage years, other parts of the brain that control sight, sound, speech, language, emotions like fear and anger and the area that creates memories are also under construction.

Using brain research to support learning

Here are some ways families can help their pre-teens and teens through this period of life:

• Keep it cool. When emotions are high, lots of things, including memory, shut down and energies focus on survival. For pre-teens, survival often means avoiding peer embarrassment. Emotional situations can be difficult for kids - getting a pimple or being called on in class can seem like high-threat situations. Though you can't shepherd them through their school days, you can help your children learn to handle the upsets they will inevitably meet. Try to role-play "what is the worst thing that could happen" scenarios. Teach your children simple relaxation and deep-breathing techniques to use when they are upset. At home, try to maintain a positive environment, as free as possible from strife. The efforts you make to work through your disagreements and find common ground can also make a difference in how well your children will learn.
   

• Create a positive learning environment. Schedule a regular time and place at home where kids can complete their homework each day. Though a work first/play later approach is best, use flexibility if this approach means they would miss out on family activities.
   

• For brains to grow, they need proper stimulation. Kids who spend much of their time on nonverbal, sedentary activities like watching television or surfing the Internet risk losing their brain's capacity to process and strengthen other more challenging and useful skills. Encourage such mind-enriching activities as exercise (a daily requirement), reading, writing, music and other hobbies.
   

• Insist on some needed R & R. Kids with jam-packed schedules may have too little time to let their minds rejuvenate. Middle schoolers need a range of experiences, both active and passive, for their brains to stay healthy. They also need your help to find the right balance. Sleep is a powerful memory aid because during dream time, learning from the previous day is processed. Meaningless information is discarded and the rest is strengthened. Young adolescents need nine to 9 1/2 hours of sleep each night to avoid such sleep deprivation symptoms as falling asleep in class, difficulty waking in morning, inability to concentrate, even depression. Studies have shown that students with little sleep earned lower grades (Cs and Ds) than those with adequate sleep (As and Bs).
   

• Organization is key. During adolescence, the areas of children's brains that influence organization are still developing (which is the reason for the frequent forgetfulness). Encourage your children to write lists and use assignment notebooks to keep track of homework and projects. Keep a calendar at home where they can post assignment due dates and other important events. Help them plan for projects as far in advance as possible. Encourage them to work on small manageable chunks of a project each day rather than doing it all at the last minute.
   

• Know your children and what types of situations are likely to trigger emotional responses. Keep the lines of communication open. If your child is doing poorly in a class, consider all the angles-is there something physical or emotional getting in the way of learning? Enlist the help of your child's guidance counselor or teacher to get to the root of the difficulty.